5 Unique Gifts for Valentine’s Day that won’t make you Vomit

Listen, I’m not one of those bitter, angry, single feminists (one out of four…). I feel very warmly about love. I’m definitely not anti-Valentine’s day. While I do think you should show love to your partner every day and I do have problems with the way it’s marketed, people in long term relationships get busy and it’s nice to have a day to remind you to make your partner(s) feel special.

Unique gifts for Valentine's BMO love Loquacious Lorna

However, I do have a huge problem with trying to find the perfect gift for my non-stereotype of a husband. Everything feels just a little bit…

Unique gifts for Valentine's cheesy lady Loquacious Lorna

No, I mean cheesy. I’m a die-hard romantic. I literally made more than four mix tapes for my husband every year of our relationship. I moved an entire country for a dude I met on the internet. I’m like the poster girl for ‘falls hard for love’.

But I also have a fun sense of humour and I really like stuff that isn’t so…boring and stereotypical.

So if you’re like me, click below to have a look at Five Unique gifts for Valentine’s Day that aren’t too cheesy pie.

1. Custom Couple Cookie Cutter

Unique gifts for Valentine's Copy Pastry cookie cutter Loquacious Lorna
Is that…James Corden?

CopyPastry on Etsy – $103.68 – Ships Worldwide.

If you don’t get why a custom couple cookie cutter is a great gift, just trust me. Not only can you give it as a gift to anyone who likes to bake, but you can bake them cookies shaped like their face and then say ‘Eat Me’ as you chew off their face with a satisfying crunch.

Unique gifts for Valentine's hana yori dango cookie Loquacious Lorna
Nothing says love like handmade cookie cannibalism.

2. Alternative Bouquets

Unique gifts for Valentine's alternative to flowers bouquet Loquacious Lorna
8 Bit, 16 bit, who can tell the difference?
Unique gifts for Valentine's alternative to flowers bouquet Loquacious Lorna
A great time for puppy soup!
Unique gifts for Valentine's alternative to flowers bouquet Loquacious Lorna
Flowers die, but the dark side is forever. With the dark side, you die. When I kill you…ho hum.

Think Geek $9.99 – $70.00 – Ships Worldwide.

From retro pixellated flowers to plush bouquets, there’s a variety of options for those who want to avoid flowers.

Whether you’re into saving the bees, have a partner who’s deathly allergic, or just want to avoid something temporary that costs so much, there’s an option for everyone! If your partner loves baked goods many local bakeries will even offer cookie bouquets, or you can buy one from a local artisan!

3. Sexy Wooden Earrings

Unique gifts for Valentine's wooden earrings Loquacious Lorna
There’s a Rebellion in my pants and you, specifically, are invited.

VectorEngraving  on Etsy – $17.13 – Ships Worldwide.

Wooden earrings are a less expensive, more unisex way to say, my heart beats for you, please don’t use the Force to stop it! I personally, love the array of geeky designs, but you can get some nice earrings for a man or a woman all over Etsy if you’re willing to look around.

Unique gifts for Valentine's poe dameron Loquacious Lorna
Wait…we’re naming him Joe Cameron? Oh right…I see.

4. Mugs

Unique gifts for Valentine's mugs Loquacious Lorna
Tentacles for a gift. I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this is going…
Unique gifts for Valentine's mugs Loquacious Lorna
Ok, this one’s a little cheesy, I’ll admit.

All over the internet and in stores – Ranging in price – Shipping depends on website.

Now I might be the only one out there with an outrageous mug fetish. Cups spilling frantically from my cupboards, desperately trying to hide my now out of control collection from my husband…ahem, but are you willing to take that chance? ARE YOU?

I didn’t think so.

Unique gifts for Valentine's mugs Loquacious Lorna
Literally me

5. Arty stuff

Unique gifts for Valentine's art Loquacious Lorna
Want to bonk on a canvas, we’ve got your back?
Unique gifts for Valentine's art Loquacious Lorna
It literally poops photos!

Uncommon Goods  – $52.00 to $246.00 – Ships Worldwide.

Anything creative that you can do as a couple makes a great Valentine’s gift. You’re spending time together and trying something new/fun. Stay away from this one if your worse half is a pinterest/creative hater.

For those guys, I’d recommend renting Oscar Isaacs for the evening.

Unique gifts for Valentine's poe dameron Loquacious Lorna
But…but Poe Dameron’s a stupid name…

I’ve done my best, but if none of these items float your V-day boat, I have one more Ace up the sleeve to show you. This present is for the desperate, the panicked and the frantic. I give you…

Unique gifts for Valentine's shark Loquacious Lorna
Noble, majestic, deadly?

Uncommon Goods  –  $262.00 – Ships Worldwide.

Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaandshark! Now if this can’t save your ailing relationship, you’re beyond my help. God speed, readers. Godspeed.

Until the next commercially manufactured holiday, I’ve been Loquacious Lorna and you’ve been a monkey’s uncle!

All opinions are my own, always 100 percent honest. I received no compensation for this review. If you have any suggestions or comments about literally anything please leave a comment below. To see more from me and learn how to transform into a majestic Landshark, subscribe to me by email on the left sidebar or via Bloglovin’.

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Montreal based Scot who writes about tech, beauty, DIY, Plus size issues, fashion, video games, life, how to be frugal and many more.